Friday, November 16, 2007

You gotta laugh!

The Children's Science Exam!

> Q: Name the four seasons.
> A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
> Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe
> to drink.
> A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large
> pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
> Q: How is dew formed?
> A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
> Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (brilliant, love this!)
> A: Keep it in the cow.
> Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
> A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All
> water
> tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the
> moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in
> this fight.
> Q: What are steroids?
> A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
> Q: What happens to your body as you age?
> A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get
> intercontinental.
> Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
> A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his
> adultery.
> Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
> A: Premature death.
> Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g.,
> abdomen.)
> A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the
> borax
> and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the
> borax
> contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains
> the
> five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.
> Q: What is the fibula?
> A: A small lie.
> Q: What does "varicose" mean? ( Gotta love this one...)
> A: Nearby.
> Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
> A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.
> Q: What does the word "benign" mean?'
> A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.


Karen H. said...

Good Morning Again Nan,
This is just way too cute. I love the last few ones though. I have heard of them. Those sound more like redneck things. Take care and have a great Friday.

Karen H.

bj said...

This is sooo cute, Nan...thanks for sharing. They brought a chuckle!
hugs, bj

Sherry said...

Thanks for my laugh of the day...I've always wanted to be "intercontinental" and apparently I'm on my way there now!! :)

Anonymous said...